So Not Following the Yellow Brick Road
by bambers2
Summary: Knocked unconscious by a witch, Dean has his own little Ozfest journey...
1. Chapter 1

_So, because i needed a laugh, and because i love the Wizard of Oz, i just had to write this!! hope everyone enjoys!! I don't own any of the character's of either story, altohugh i wish i did!!! Wizard of OZ written by Frank l Baum 1900..._

_Chapter One_

Dean briefly spotted Sam, taking aim at the old haggard witch, out of the corner of his eye just before he was hurled against another wall. Hitting the hard stone at full speed, Dean crumpled to the ground with a groan. "Plan on shooting her any time soon, Dorothy, or are ya lookin' for a bucket of water to dump over her head."

"Kinda difficult when she keeps disappearing and reappearing, Dean," Sam complained, redirecting his aim to the far corner of the old stone cottage.

The old hag smacked a wax figure, she held in her spindly hand, against the gray stone, and Dean went careening through the air, slamming into the far wall.

"Shoot the bitch, already." Dean braced himself against the rough stone, and had barely managed to get to his feet when he was hurtled into a thick wooden support beam. Dean slowly stood, the room shifting in and out of focus, as blood dripped from a deep gash on his forehead. He touched the cut, and winced. "Gettin' kinda tired of being a human pinball, Sammy."

Taking aim, Sam fired an iron round into the witch's heart just as Dean was thrown headlong into another study beam. The witch's screech reverberated off the walls, as she slumped to the ground. Sam stared at her a moment, waiting to see if she'd move, and when she didn't he swung to find his brother. Dean lay in a tangled mess on the ground, his arm bent at an awkward position, his eyes closed.

"Dean," Sam shouted, rushing toward him. He knelt beside his brother, and quickly checked to see if he was breathing, and let out a deep sigh of relief when he saw his brother chest slowly rise and fall. "Come on, wake up, dude." Gently patting Dean on the side of the face, Sam tried to coax him awake, but Dean didn't respond.

A worried frown creased Sam's forehead. "It's gonna be okay, Dean, gonna get you to the hospital, and they'll fix you up." Sam pocketed his gun, hauled Dean to his feet, hooking his arm around his brother's waist, and dragged him out of the cottage toward the Impala.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

Dean's eyelids fluttered open briefly and then he blinked hard against the near blinding array of technicolor lights assaulting his senses. Tall, lush green grass prickled at his back, and the sides of his face. He slowly rolled on his side, grimacing as pain shot through his throbbing head.

He squinted, then took a furtive glance around at his surroundings, trying to determine where he was. Everything appeared at least ten times brighter than it normally would look, except one lone house, that stood as bleak and gray amongst the rainbow of colors.

Hearing the sound of chittering laughter, Dean glanced around at the small homes that looked like large mushrooms, nestled in and amongst the trees. In the center of the tiny village, there was a flowing stream with bluer than blue water. A small bridge lead over the stream and into the town. Beyond that, a swirling golden road spread outward from the center of the town.

"Yeah, so not in Kansas anymore."

Dean looked around for any sign of Sam, but couldn't find him. "Sam?" he called out, and when he heard rustling in the trees and large leafy fronds, he yelled a little louder. "Sammy, where the hell are you?" The trees went still, and Dean could hear the muffled sound of worried voices.

Bracing his hand against a tree, with shiny leaves that almost looked like plastic, Dean rose to stand on shaky legs, and trudged toward the ramshackle gray house. He wasn't even halfway there when he noticed a small iridescent bubble floating toward him, growing larger the closer it got to the bridge.

The bubble burst, spraying droplets of water everywhere, and a beautiful woman with a reddish-blonde hair, wearing a glistening crown appeared. Dean did a double-take, and then swung to stare at his surroundings again.

"Oh, you gotta be freakin' kidding me." He swivelled to face her again. "Must've hit my head harder than I thought."

She looked at him with a confused and somewhat wary expression on her face. "Are you a good witch or — "

"Yeah, let's cut through all that good witch, bad witch, blah, blah, blah, and start with you telling me where my brother, Sam, is."

"The munchkins called to me, and said your house landed on the Wicked Witch of the East," she said as if she hadn't heard him.

"So not my house." He gestured toward the rundown home with shattered windows. "I'm thinkin it belongs to Dorothy . . . different part of Kansas."

"So you're not a witch?"

A cocksure grin settled on Dean's face. "I'm a Winchester, born and bred, and witch killer extraordinaire."

She raised a delicate brow, and pointed toward the house with her wand. "Then you did kill the Wicked Witch of the East?"

"Yeah . . . I mean no. Sammy killed the witch or at least he better have, or I'm so kickin' his ass."

"Then the ruby slippers belong to him. Where is he, so I can give them to him?"

Dean nearly choked on a laugh, hearing that. "I'm thinkin' Sammy's not much of a ruby slipper kinda guy."

"Well, then they are yours, Winchester." She waved her wand and the slippers magically appeared in her hand. She gave them to Dean, who quickly pocketed them in his leather jacket.

"The name's Dean, and I ain't wearin' any damn slippers either, Glinda."

A look of shocked surprised graced the good witch's face. "You must be a very powerful wizard to know my name, and to also refuse the magic inside the ruby slippers." Glinda raised her hands in the air, and gestured for the munchkins to come out of hiding. "Come out, come out, my little munchkins and meet Dean, grand wizard and self-proclaimed witch killer extraordinaire."

From the trees, houses, manholes, and large birdlike nests, little munchkins emerged, filling the street. They giggled and chatted amongst themselves as they cautiously eyed Dean, still somewhat hesitant.

"You're so not gonna break into song here, are you?" As an afterthought, he added, "But, if anyone from the Lollipop Guild has an extra lollipop hangin' around, I could sure use a sugar fix right about now."

A man with orange curling hair, and moustache to match slowly crept forward, and handed him a sucker.

"Thanks." Dean ripped off the wrapper and licked the lollipop several times, then drew it away from his lips, and pointed toward the yellow brick road with it. "So, I take it, that I have to follow the yellow brick road to OZ, where the 'wizard'," Dean made a hanging quotes gesture with his fingers, and then continued, "Will have me go an' kill the Wicked Witch of the West, and then I will go back to OZ, just to find out I could've gotten home all the time by clicking my heels together three times, right?"

"The Wizard of Oz, is very powerful, but very mysterious. If anyone can help you find your way home, it's him." Glinda turned and waved her wand in the direction of the Emerald City.

He inclined his head, and looked to where she pointed, and saw an emerald glow settling on the horizon. "Ah, what the hell. But, I swear to God, I better not hear anyone singing, _Follow the Yellow Brick Road_, or I'm so gonna kick some munchkin ass."

All the munchkins, shuffled backward, hearing the threat, and the one who had crept out the manhole, dove back inside. Dean strode to the yellow brick road, followed it as it swirled outward, like he'd seen Dorothy do so many times before on tv, and headed toward the Emerald City.

Dean followed the road for a long time, wishing for about the hundredth time he'd at least asked for some water for the long journey. The sun was settling in the west when he came upon the infamous fork in the road. He paused and glanced up at the scarecrow, waiting for it to speak. "Dude, you — "

"Don't even say it, Dean." The scarecrow raised it's head, and Dean laughed, looking at Sam all garbed in a scarecrow apparel, straw sticking out beneath his brown cap, gloves, and boots. "Just get me the hell down from here."

Dean stopped laughing long enough to untie Sam from the post he was bound to, and then started laughing again. "Huh, guess that makes me the smart one, doesn't it, oh, brainless one."

"So not funny, Dean."

"Seriously, dude, could you sing, _If I Only Had a Brain_, for me?"

"You're such a jerk," Sam grumbled.

"Bitch."

Sam yanked off the dirty brown hat he wore, and straw scattered everywhere, enticing Dean to chuckle even harder. Scowling at Dean, Sam pulled the burlap sack off his head, and raked his fingers through his long brown hair.

"Glad you're finding this funny. You weren't the one stuck up on that pole for the last several hours." Sam stretched his long arms across his chest, and then briskly rubbed them, trying to get the feeling back into them. His legs wobbled precariously, feeling as if they were made out of straw, and almost fell, but Dean caught him.

"Dude, that was an awesome impression of the scarecrow." Dean's lips twitched as he tried to control his laughter. A mirthful, devilish gleam lit in his green eyes. "Someone's been secretly taking acting lessons when they say they're at the library doing research, aren't they?"

Sam glared at Dean for a second and then his frown slowly turned to a grin, dimples forming in his cheeks, and then full-on peals of laughter ripped from his lips.

"What's so funny?" Dean asked, releasing Sam.

"I'm . . . I'm the scarecrow."

"Yeah, already established that, brainless."

"I'm the scarecrow." He laughed even harder, grabbing onto to Dean's shoulder to steady himself.

"Again, we've already covered that. So what's so damn funny."

"Well, that would mean you're Dorothy."

Scowling, Dean pushed his brother away. Sam nearly fell over, but quickly regained his balance.

"Okay, so you're not the scarecrow."

"Oh, I'm so the scarecrow, Dorothy." Sam guffawed. "Tell me, did you sing, _Somewhere Over the Rainbow_? Cause I gotta tell ya, I'd pay good money to hear it again, if you did." Sam stopped laughing, and stared seriously at his brother for a moment, but there was a devious twinkle in his hazel eyes. "And where are those ruby red slippers, gorgeous. Come on, don't be a tease, model them for me, sweetheart. You know what a turn on high-heels are for me." He puckered his lips and blew Dean a kiss.

"I'm so gonna kick your ass after we find our way back home. You know that, right?" Dean turned to look at the road, figuring out which way they should go. "So which way, Sam?"

Sam pointed to the left. "Well, some people go this way." He crossed one arm over the other, pointing to the right. "And some people go this way." Glancing at Dean, he grinned boyishly. "And some people go both ways."

"You're lovin' this, aren't you?"

"You gotta admit it's kinda fun. It's our own little Ozfest. We already know who the baddie is, and how to kill it . . . and if we get bored all you have to do is click your ruby red slippers together three times, and we're back home in the Impala."

"Yeah, guess you're right." Dean turned to the left, and followed the road. "Besides, if you're the scarecrow, I'm just dying to find out who the tinman, cowardly lion, and the Wizard of OZ are."

Sam matched his brother's stride, slipping slightly every few feet or so, on his wobbly legs. As he strode, he took in the lush greenery, and giant blossoming flowers, marveling at all the colors. "Kinda makes you want to sing, _We're Off to See the Wizard_, doesn't it?"

"Um, not so much."


	2. Chapter 2

_what can i say, two chapters in one week, this one is just too darn fun not to want to write it!! thanks for reading!! hope everyone enjoys...let me know what you think!! bambers;)_

_Chapter Two_

"Stop skipping, Sam." Dean said, noticing his brother's fidgeting.

"I'm not skipping." Sam glared at Dean as he continued to twitch and wriggle around.

"Oh, you're so totally skipping, dude."

"No, I'm not." Sam twisted his hand behind his back, reached under his green tunic, and yanked out a handful of straw, and showed it to Dean. "I've got freakin' straw crammed in places you can't even imagine."

With a smirk on his face, Dean eyed the straw for a moment, and then glanced up at his brother. "Still say you were skipping."

"Oh, like you can talk, mister, I've been singing _Somewhere Over the Rainbow _under your breath for the last twenty minutes, thinking I wouldn't hear you."

"New Winchester rule, only those not dressed like characters from Oz get to make fun of everyone else, and those who are, have to shut their pie hole."

Sam itched furiously at his sides, and yanked out even more straw from between the holes in his shirt and threw it on the ground. "Don't see why I got stuck in costume, while you aren't dressed in drag with a big freakin red bow on the top of you head."

Dean strode on head of Sam, calling out, "Think I'd even make that look good."

As the boys traveled the yellow brick road, the path ahead became enshrouded by large overgrown apple trees. Sam's stomach rumbled uncomfortably at the sight of the bright and shiny apples. "I'm starvin, Dean."

Dean followed his brother's gaze to the orchard, and shook his head in disbelief. "Oh, come on, Sammy, you've seen the movie a million times, you know what's gonna happen when we try to freakin' pick one. You can wait."

"Easy for you to say. I'm sure you weaseled one of those huge lollipops from the Lollipop Guild, didn't you?"

Dean had a hard suppressing a sheepish grin. "Hey, who am I to argue if some munchkin happens to want to give me lollipop? Would've asked for M&M's too if I thought they had some." He took the large sucker out of his pocket, unwrapped it and started munching on it. With his mouth full of candy, Dean added, "Besides, that was an essential scene in the movie, and who am I to argue with Frank Baum and MGM studios?"

"Dude, I'm gettin an apple."

"Okay, but when you get your ass kicked by a tree, don't say I didn't warn you." Dean sat on the curb edging the yellow brick road, and chomped away at his candy, while Sam stormed to the nearest tree. "Hey, Sammy, if the tree gives you a hard time, just tell it the apples have worms in them. That's seemed to go over real well for the scarecrow in the movie. Just remember duck and weave when they start throwing them at you."

Grabbing hold of an apple, Sam turned to glare at Dean, and yanked on the fruit. "They aren't gonna kick my — "

A thick leafy branched hand, swatted Sam across the back, knocking him to the ground.

"What do you think you're doing?" the tree angrily asked. "How would you like someone to come along and pick something off of you?"

Sam clambered to his feet, fists raised defensively.

"Go get him, tiger." Dean roared with laughter, watching his younger brother bob and weave as the tree swung out at him.

"This is so not funny, Dean," Sam called back over his shoulder.

"That's cause you're not sittin' here watching it happen . . . never looked this funny in the movie."

The tree grabbed hold of Sam's arm and tossed him into the outstretched branches of another who pushed Sam back into the original tree.

"A little help here would be nice, Dorothy."

Dean stood, and called to Sam. "You don't want any of _those_ apples."

The tree stopped fighting with Sam, and glared menacingly at Dean. "Are you hinting my apples aren't what they ought to be?"

"No, he just doesn't want apples with little green worms in them." In an instant the furious tree forgot all about Sam, and started hurling apples at Dean. Sam sprinted toward his brother, following as Dean jogged up an embankment. Snatching an apple off the ground, Dean handed it to Sam. "Told you healthy food wasn't good for you."

"Dude, your Wizard of Oz knowledge is a bit on the — "

Wondering why his brother stopped speaking, Dean glanced at Sam, and saw him staring, slack-jawed at something behind him. He swung to take a look at what had his brother struck speechless, and his mouth dropped open as well.

"Oh, God, I wish I had a camera," Dean finally uttered, walking over to the tinman. Knocking on the tarnished full-metal gray suit Bobby was wearing, they heard a deep drumming noise echoing from inside. "Hey, Sammy you try."

Sam banged his fist on Bobby's stomach, and chuckled as the old hunter glared at him. "He's so gonna be pissed at us, but this is priceless," he said, banging on the Bobby's chest again.

Bobby stood unmoving, holding up an ax in his right hand, an oil funnel replacing his usual baseball cap. His face, including his scruffy beard, was painted silver to match the tin. "Oil can, you friggin' idiots." Bobby muttered, through closed lips.

Dean found the oil can sitting on a tree stump and quickly started oiling their lifelong friend. "Seems kinda fitting somehow that the tinman should be Bobby."

"Why's that?" Sam asked, having a hard time keeping a straight face as Bobby wiggled his jaw back and forth.

"Well, he oils and lubes cars at the salvage yard for a living, and now we're greasin' him up."

"True, I'd say he's good for about the next three thousand miles or until it rains, whichever come first."

Bobby dropped the ax he was holding, and stretched out his arms and legs. "Which one of you two knuckleheads, is responsible for this?"

"I'm thinkin' it's Dorothy's fault," Sam said, pointing at Dean.

Bobby stared at Dean for a second and then started laughing. "Guess I don't feel so bad about being the tinman anymore."

"He won't admit it, Bobby, but he's dying to put on those ruby red slippers, and prance around the yellow brick road."

Dean arched a brow and glared at his brother and then at Bobby. "Already told you, Sammy, I'm so totally not Dorothy."

"Awww. . . of course you are, sweetcheeks." Sam chuckled. "An' when we get to the Emerald City, I'm gonna buy somethin really pretty for ya. Thinkin' something in red silk, wouldn't want to chaff your delicate skin, princess."

"One more word, Sammy, an' I'm gonna knock the stuffing outta ya." Dean gestured to the hay sticking out of Sam's shirt, and mockingly added, "Literally."

"You boys both shut yer traps, and help me out onto the road, so we can get this over with." Bobby clumsily marched toward the yellow brick road, his tin suit clanking loudly with each step.

"Wait, Bobby." Dean caught hold of the old hunter's arm, stopping him. He winked at Sam, and Sam nodded. He looked at Bobby, trying to hide his amusement at the older man's discomfort. "You gotta sing. We both did, didn't we Sam?"

"Yeah, both Dean and I sang." Sam shrugged, a sheepish grin plastered to his face. "Dude, you should've heard Dean belting out _Follow the Yellow Brick Road. _I've never heard him sing like that before . . . well, there was that whole REO Speedwagon thing, but I'm not even gonna go there."

Dean tilted his head to the side so he could look around Bobby's massive tin chest and at his brother. "Yeah, thanks for not going there."

"Well, come on, dude, REO? I mean really . . . it had to be said."

Staring at his brother for a few seconds longer, Dean nodded in agreement. "Yeah, definitely not one of my shining moments." He then returned his attention to Bobby. "So how about it? Think it starts out with something like, 'when a man's an empty kettle, he should be on his mettle, and yet I'm torn apart'."

Sam nearly choked on a laugh, listening to his brother as Dean practically broke into song and dance. "Dude, you seriously watched this movie way too much as a kid."

Dean glared at Sam, and then strode away down the small hill leading to the yellow brick road, calling back over his shoulder. "What do you freakin' expect. I was born in Kansas. If we had a state movie, Wizard of OZ would be it."

Sam turned to look at Bobby, and shrugged. "Guess he's got me there."


	3. Chapter 3

_so, yeah, chapter three...a little out of order from how it happens in the movies, but what the heck...hope it in someway entertains or puts a smile everyone's faces...thanks for reading!! let me know what you think!! bambers;)_

_Chapter Three_

The sky darkened to a deep indigo as the boys and Bobby headed deeper into the forest. Large leafy fronds and ferns crept outward to cover the yellow brick road, and at times the path completely disappeared from view. The trees grew closer together, and high aloft in them, the rag-tag trio noticed the red eyes of what appeared to be two very fake plastic looking owls. The owls screeched ominously as only two fake birds of prey could.

Dean glanced at the owls, chuckling. "Think MGM could've hired a better effects guys."

Sam peered into the trees and then at Dean, a somewhat hopeful look on his face. "Just once, Dean?"

"Nope, not gonna happen."

"Come on, you know you want to."

"Only if Bobby does, too."

They both looked over their shoulders at the old hunter turned tinman, and he did his best to shake his head.

"Ain't gonna happen," Bobby grumbled.

"Bobby, you can't be in OZ without saying it." Sam pleaded his case, hoping to sway the older man. "I won't oil you again til you do," he added, holding the oil can just out of reach when Bobby resolutely stood his ground.

"One time, and if you two ever tell anyone I said it, I'll knock both yer heads together."

Dean eyed Sam, bobbed his head in Bobby's direction, then grinned, and Sam nodded in understanding.

"On the count of three . . . one . . . two . . . three . . . ."

"Lions and tigers and bears, oh my." Bobby uttered, all by himself, and both boys broke into riotous laughter.

"See, Sammy, I told you. Bobby's so totally a closet Oz fan."

"Oh God, when he said, 'oh my', I thought I was gonna loose some of my stuffing."

Bobby grimaced, and strode away from the boys, grumbling under his breath.

"Aww . . . come back, Bobby, we were only kidding." Dean chuckled even harder, listening to the sound of Bobby's suit clanking together as he walked.

As the boys strode deeper into the forest, with Bobby marching along ahead of them, they heard the what sounded like a pathetic attempt at growling, followed by a weak roar.

Dean inclined his head toward the noise, then glanced at Sam. "Oh, this is gonna be good, Sammy. Wanna make a bet on who it is?"

"Five bucks says it's Andy."

"Andy?" Dean shook his head. "Dude, it's so totally gonna be Ash. He's got Cowardly Lion written all over him. I mean seriously, did you hear that roar?"

Bobby stopped to catch his breath, waiting for the boys to catch up. "I'd like ta see yer father be the Cowardly Lion."

Dean and Sam looked at Bobby, and both threw back their heads, laughing in earnest.

"Oh, man, Sammy," Dean clapped his hand on his brother's shoulder as he continued to chuckle. "Can you just picture Dad with his mane all in curls and a little red bow on top of his head? Now there's a mental image that's gonna stick with me for sometime."

"I can just see him now, singing, _If I Were the King of the Forest._" Sam chortled even harder, tears springing to his eyes. "Oh God, please let it be him."

Sam opened his mouth to say something more, but from out of no where the lion pounced, knocking him to the ground. Dean quickly rushed forward, grabbed a handful of very loose fur and yanked the lion off of his brother.

Whipping the lion around to face him, Dean had an extremely hard time keeping a straight face.Ash's lion suit hung in loose bunches around his thin frame, and pooled at his ankles. His long shaggy mane dipped below his eyes, and he constantly had to brush it away from his face with a swat of his paw. Glaring at Dean, he twitched his whiskers, and let out a low whiny roar.

"Ash, dude, looks as if you better head back to wardrobe, think they forgot to stuff you."

"Dean." Sam shook his head, and gave his brother a look of disapproval.

"Come on, Sammy, like you weren't thinkin' it."

"I mean, yeah sure, he looks kinda pathetic, but I wasn't gonna say it aloud."

"Um, standin' right here guys." Ash growled again, swiping a paw at Dean.

"Seriously, dude, you need to work on that roar, sounds like a cat who's just had it's tail run over."

"While choking on a hairball," Sam added, as he took hold of his brother's hand and Dean helped him to his feet. "Sure you aren't supposed to be Toto, Ash, seems like a better fit?"

"Oh, I could so totally see him as Toto. I mean, he's got the whole size thing working for him."

"Gettin kinda personal," Ash admonished, as he gesture to Sam's clothes. "Did I say anything about you lookin like a lopsided bag of hay, Sam, or Bobby over there, like a shimmering junkyard?" He bobbed his head in Dean's direction. "And who are you supposed to be anyway, Dean?"

"He's Dorothy," Sam and Bobby supplied in unison, both grinning as Dean scowled.

Ash tilted his head to the side, stared Dean up and down, and then grinned. "I've seen uglier women . . . hell, I've dated uglier women." He winked at Dean. "What say you and I go back to my den, sweetheart."

"So not funny, dude."

Licking his lips, Ash, twitched his whiskers, and let out a low catlike growl. "Oh, I could literally just eat you up, you scrumptious little morsel." Ash blew him a kiss, and Dean's brows pulled together as his frown deepened.

"Dorothy's a tease, Ash, isn't she Bobby?" Sam rested his elbow on Bobby's tin shoulder, and gestured in Dean's direction. "Her eyes may say yes, but for some damn reason her lips keep saying no."

"Yeah, the pretty ones, always are." Ash tried his best to look disappointed, but even the mounds of fur sagging on his face couldn't hide his grin.

"Are we just about finished here, makin fun of the _only_ person who doesn't look like a complete and utter idiot?" Dean angrily strode away, heading deeper into the forest, not bothering to wait for them.

Ash looked from Sam to Bobby and back again, shrugging. "What did I say?"

"Don't worry about it, I'm thinkin' Dorothy has PMS." Sam chuckled, and then hurried to catch up with his brother.

Bobby clopped over to where Ash stood, gave a slight nod in the two Winchester's direction, and said, "If they tell ya, you gotta sing, don't." he shuddered involuntarily, tin clanking together loudly. "I did, and heard nothing but non-stop laughter for about ten miles."

"Bad singing voice, Bobby?"

"No, think it might've been the dancing, that got them."

The boys, Ash, and Bobby noticed a small white-washed cottage with green thatched roof in the distance, and Dean picked up his pace, heading straight for it.

Ash bobbed his head in Dean's direction and asked Sam, "What's up with him? Why's he rushing off like that?"

"No one knows this, but Dean's kind of a Wizard of Oz freak. Never missed it when it came on tv when we were younger." Sam drew in a breath, readjusted the straw inside his shirt so it stopped itching his sides, and continued, "This is his favorite part. The witch on the rooftop, threatening Dorothy, blah, blah, blah, she throws fire at the scare — hey, wait, I'm the freakin' scarecrow. Hey, Dean wait up." Sam hurried to catch up with his brother.

By the time Sam reached his brother, Dean was already standing in front of the cottage, a hopeful look on his face.

"You happen to forget who the scarecrow is, Dean?"

"Don't be a girl, Sam. She didn't even come close to burning the scarecrow with the ball of fire."

"As I recall, she came pretty darn close."

In a burst of red writhing smoke, the Wicked Witch of the West appeared, holding her infamous broom, long and spindly fingers wrapped tightly around it, and a look of awe spread across Dean's face. She was every bit as green as Dean recalled from tv, and her dress, blacker than black. Her long jaw jut out angularly to her face, and she had the perfect long witch's nose.

"Helping the little man along, are you, my fine young gentlemen?" She cackled, pointing bent fingers toward Dean.

"Ha, she thinks you're short, Dean." Sam nodded to the witch. Dean glared at Sam for a second, and then returned his attention to the her.

"Well, stay away from him." She pointed a finger at Sam. "Or I'll stuff a mattress with you."

"Oh, this is freakin' awesome, Sammy."

"Just put a bullet in her, Dean, and let's get outta here."

"Wanna hear her say it first."

"Dude, she's not gonna say it. You don't even have a dog."

Dean hitched a thumb back at Ash. "We got Ash back there . . . she'll never know the difference."

"Hey, I resent that," Ash said, pounding on his own chest. "I make a damn fine lion."

"Yeah, whatever, Toto." Dean cleared his throat and called up to the witch. "Look, can we just forget all this throwing fire at my brother crap, and get to the part where you say, 'I'll get you my pretty . . . then I can blow you away with my .45, and we can get the hell outta here?"

The witch arched a wicked black brow. "Here, Scarecrow. Want to play ball." She drew back her arm and a ball of fire appeared, and she tossed it at Sam.

Sam leapt backward, hopping and leaping about, trying to get away from the flames. Bobby quickly stomped on the fire, putting it out with his heavy tin feet.

In an instant, Dean withdrew his gun from his waistband and fired several rounds, but the witch disappeared in an explosion of bright orange flames and red smoke, the bullets lodging in a nearby tree.

"See, Dean, couldn't just blow the bitch away when I asked you to."

"Ah, Sammy, it's not like you were gonna get hurt, you've seen the movie tons of times." Dean tucked his gun back in his waistband, and motioned for them to follow. "It's not like when the flying monkeys attack and scatter bits of you — " Turning to look back at Sam, Ash, and Bobby, Dean's brows pulled together in a frown. "Um, yeah, better be on the lookout for flying monkeys."

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_didn't want to have one of the character's from the show be the Wicked Witch of the West cause they do kill her in the end, and i just couldn't see them killing off Ellen...also chose not to have it be Meg either cause i wanted the story to remain light-hearted and with Meg around that wouldn't have happened!! hope you enjoy..._


	4. Chapter 4

_so, hopefully everyone continues to enjoy the journey through Oz!! thanks for all the great reviews!! let me know what you think!! bambers;)_

_Chapter Four_

Dean sat, leaning against a gnarled old tree, staring at the endless rows of poppies, spreading out as far as the eye could see. "Something with poison in it, I think. With poison in it, but attractive to the eye, and soothing to the to the smell. Poppies . . . Poppies . . . Poppies."

Sam stood with his back to Dean, talking quietly with Ash and Bobby a few feet away. Twisting his arm over his shoulder, Sam tried to itch his back, and when he couldn't quite get the spot he was aiming for, he reached under his tunic, yanked out fistful of straw, and threw it on the ground in frustration. He then turned and stalked to Dean. "You just about finished doing your rendition of the Wicked Witch, Dean." He hitched a thumb back toward Bobby and Ash, and continued, "Cause, the Tinman has to go to the bathroom and isn't quite sure how . . . and, I think the Lion has fleas."

Tilting his head to the side, to look around Sam, Dean saw Ash furiously scratching at his ears, and chest. Bobby fidgeted, his tin suit clanking loudly as he shifted from one foot to the other.

"What do you want me to do about it, Sammy? It's not like the Tinman came with a freakin' owner's manual." Dean rose to stand, brushed the dirt of his pants, and pointed to the Cowardly Lion. "And as for Ash, we'll have him dipped when we get to the Emerald City."

"You figure out a way to get through those poisoned poppies, yet?" Sam swung to glance in the direction of the multi-colored field of flowers. "Cause that's a heck of a lot of flowers."

"Yeah, I got a plan."

"Listen up, Bobby, Ash," Sam called over his shoulder. "Dorothy has a plan."

Dean grimaced, glaring at his brother. "You're loving this, aren't you."

Sam chuckled. "Yeah, I am. I really am. Payback's a bitch." He turned back to face Dean. "Let's see there was," he began tallying on his fingers, "Francis, Samantha, Dorothy, and all the PMS jokes, not to mention the 'don't be a girl, Sam'."

"Point taken."

"So what's the plan?"

"I'm thinkin' we run really fast through it."

Sam swivelled to look at the massive field of flowers, then twisted back to stare incredulously at Dean. "You've been sitting here for the past half hour, reciting your favorite Wicked Witch lines to yourself, thinkin' no one could hear you, and the best idea you could come up with is run really fast?"

Dean arched a brow, and stared at his brother, green eyes mirthful. "No, surprisingly that only took a couple of minutes to figure out. The rest of the time I was just thinkin' how freakin ridiculous you guys look." Dean bobbed his head toward Ash. "I mean, look at Ash, doing that tail swishing thing, and every couple of minutes growling pathetically. Then there's Bobby, hopping around looking like he's doing some sort of odd ritual tinman rain dance." Dean looked Sam squarely in the eyes, and smirked. "An' I'm not even going to go into what you've been doing."

Sam lowered his head, but before he did, Dean saw his brother's face turned a dusky shade of pink.

"So . . . run real fast. Sounds like a good idea."

"I thought you'd like it."

"Okay, so our brilliant leader suggests we run through the poison poppies. An' if I see anyone trying to give Dorothy mouth-to-mouth when she passes out like a girl, you'll have to answer to me."

Noticing Dean getting ready to smack him, Sam ducked and took off at a dead run, leaving them all behind. He was nearly halfway through the field of overgrown flowers when he stopped to see how far behind everyone else was, and saw Bobby standing alone. "Huh, think it would've taken a brain surgeon to figure out why this plan failed so miserably."

Sam quickly sprinted back to where the Tinman stood, and saw his brother and Ash curled up, nestled amongst the flowers. Dean rolled over, snuggled closer to Ash, wrapping his arm tightly around Ash's stomach, and Ash let out a soft purr.

With a somewhat bemused expression on his face, Sam stared at his brother and Ash sleeping peacefully. "That's wrong on so many levels, I don't even know where to begin to comment."

"Yeah, kinda boggles the mind, doesn't it." Bobby chuckled good-naturedly as he gestured toward Dean, and then looked at Sam. "So, you gonna kiss Sleeping Beauty to wake her, Prince Charming?" He then lifted his hand toward the heavens. "Or, are you gonna call on that big head of Glinda in the sky, so she can make it snow."

"I'm thinkin' option two. Wouldn't want Ash to get jealous."

"Well, have that oil can ready, I'm already rusted enough as it is."

Sam inclined his head toward the sky, and shouted, "Hey, could use a little help down here."

Snow began to fall almost instantly, covering the field in glistening white. Dean yawned, opened his eyes, and immediately noticed he was hugging Ash. "Awkward." He then glanced up at his brother, who was having a hard time keeping a straight face, and quickly yanked his arm away from the lion.

Grinning ear to ear, Sam gestured to the Dean and Ash. "You two need a little alone time?" He hitched a thumb toward the Emerald City. "Cause if you do, Bobby and I can run along ahead. We wouldn't want to stand in the way of true love."

"You know I'm totally gonna kick your ass, right, Sammy?"

"Ah, yeah, but it's so worth it."

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

Within a half hour, they reached the Emerald City, and stood at the double doors of the green sparkling massive wall surrounding the city.

"Bell out of order. Please, knock," they all said in unison.

A few minutes later, a man with dark hair, and bushy moustache, wearing a large furry green hat, opened a circular door high above them. "State your business?"

Stepping back away from the door so he could see the man better, Dean said, "We came to see the Wizard."

"Ooh, the Wizard? Nobody's ever seen the great Oz. Even I've never seen him."

Hearing that, Sam turned to Dean, and arched a brow. "I'll do your laundry for an entire month if the Wizard's not Dad, Dean."

"So not taking that bet, Sammy."

Bobby impatiently tapped his tin fingers on the fortress wall, garnering the guard's attention. "Look, Dorothy needs to get in to see the Wizard. I have to find a tin smith, so I can go to the bathroom," he bobbed his head in Ash's direction, "he's in desperate need of a flea bath." Drawing in a deep breath, Bobby hitched a thumb toward Sam, and continued, "And, he'll just bug the hell outta ya, until you give in. So you may as well, just open the doors."

The guard pursed his lips, and rubbed his chin as he looked them all over carefully, his eyes coming to rest on Sam. "Bug the hell out of me, you say?"

"He was going to school to be a lawyer," Dean quickly supplied.

The guard nodded in understanding. "Enough said." He slammed the small door shut, and a few seconds later, the main door swung open, and they strode inside.

Dean glanced around in awe of the amazing palace that spread out before him. Men and women all garbed in various shades of green, strolled along, laughing and chatting amongst themselves. A full-course band marched along the dark onyx floors, playing _We're Off to See the Wizard_. And, off to the right side of the palace, several women sat beside a fountain with bubbling green water, smiling and whispering to each other. One glanced up, winked at Dean, and waved for him to join them. He was about to head in their direction, but Sam grabbed hold of his arm.

"Think with your upstairs brain, Dean."

"Kinda hard to do that when my downstairs brain wants to be over there with them."

Reluctantly, Dean stayed where he was, much to the displeasure of the Emerald City beauties. He craned his neck, searching the entire castle, before he disappointedly turned to look at the guard who stood beside him. "Where's the horse of a different color?"

"Oh, she's sick. Been stuck on blue for at least a week."

"Yeah, that would be my luck." Dean changed the subject, trying to hide his disappointment. "So, when can we see the Wizard?"

"No one can see the Wizard. He's in conference with himself on this witch business," the guard replied as he quickly pointed out the tin smith's shop to a very agitated Bobby, and then gestured to the dog grooming shop next door.

"See, told you it was, Dad." Sam said as he watched Bobby and Ash rush off toward the two shops.

"That could just be a coincidence, Sammy."

"Oh, come on, Dean. Conferring with himself on the witch business . . . that's got Dad written all over it."

Scratching the back of his head, Dean tried to think of anyone else it could be, but couldn't think of another person who fit the bill. "Yeah, guess your right." He returned his attention to the guard. "Look, we're witch hunters, sent here by the Glinda, and we're not leaving till we see Oz."

A bright smile lit across the guard's face. "Well, why didn't you say so in the first place. I'll tell the Wizard you're here. And when your friends are finished, I'll take you right to him." The guard rushed off to inform the Wizard before they had a chance to say anything else.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

Within an hour the boys, Bobby and Ash were standing at the entrance of the throne room of the great and powerful Oz. High arching windows illuminated the long corridor, and ended just before a row of large black columns.

They marched in stride toward the throne, stopping within mere feet of it. Thick smoke billowed from where the throne should have been, bright orange flames erupting from within the wall of white. A mammoth green head, with a scruffy beard and dark brows, appeared and floated amongst the flames.

"I am Oz, the great and powerful," the floating head declared with self-importance.

Dean stared at it for a moment, then turned to Sam. "Kinda puts a whole new perspective on the head of the family thing, doesn't it, Sammy?"

Sam nodded in agreement. "Always thought he kinda had a swollen head, but this is just ridiculous."

"Silence," the giant head of their father commanded.

"Oh, yeah, so definitely, Dad." Sam grumbled, stuffing his clenched fists in his pockets. "Why he couldn't have just texted us coordinates to where the witch lived, is beyond me."

"No hands, dude, would've been a little tough."

Ash leaned over and whispered to Dean. "Are we supposed to follow the script here, or just find out where the witch is? Cause if he is all-powerful like he says, I gotta a couple of requests . . . like new laptop for starters. Then there's the hot chick who keeps coming into the Roadhouse . . . ."

Dean eyed him for a second, and shook his head. "Stick to the script."

"Then I think it's your line, Dean," Sam interjected. "Something about you being small and meek."

The flames erupted again, sending writhing smoke skyward. "Silence, you billowing bale of bovine fodder."

Dean chuckled."Think he's talkin to you, Sammy."

"Yeah, I got that, Dean." Sam's brow's furrowed as he glared at his father.

"Bring me the broomstick of the Wicked Witch of the West." John commanded.

Dean took several steps toward his father, stopping just short of the grand sweeping staircase leading to his father. "Yeah, about that. Are we supposed to use holy water to kill her, or will plain old tap water do the trick?" He hesitated, seeing the look of anger on his father's humongous face. "Always wondered about that. I mean, would a bucket of holy water really just be lying around the castle of the wicked witch?"

"Just bring me her broomstick, and I will grant your requests." The flames shot even higher, licking at the ceiling.

"Sounds good to me," Bobby moved to stand beside Dean. "I for one want out of this tin suit."

Ash followed, leaving Sam behind. "Oh, I don't know, I kinda like being a lion. Well, except for that whole waking up in Dean's arms — that was just — "

"Ash." Dean cuffed him across the head. "Just shut the hell up, before I toss your sorry ass outta the window."

"Why doesn't he just go kill her himself," Sam said angrily. "Not like he's ever wanted our help before."

Dean swung to face his younger brother. "Sammy, he's a big freakin head, what do you expect him to do? Crush her to death with it?"

Sam's scowl faded, replaced by an awkward smile. "Yeah, that would definitely make the blooper reel."

"So what do you say, dude? Ready to go kill the bitch."

With a curt nod of his head, Sam conceded. "Ah, why the hell not."


	5. Chapter 5

_Chapter Five up!! hope veryone is enjoying the story!!! thanks for reading!! let me know what you think...reviews are golden!! bambers;)_

_Chapter Five_

As the boys, Ash, and Bobby trudged along through the ever-darkening forest, they came upon a sign.

"Haunted Forest. Witch's Castle One Mile . . . I'd Turn Back If Were You," Ash said, and hearing an owl screech from high aloft in the trees, he turned around to head back in the other direction.

Dean and Sam glanced at each other briefly, then grabbed a hold under Ash's arms, lifted him up and turned him back around.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, Ash?" Dean asked.

Ash gestured toward the sign with his paw. "Sign says turn back, the lion always turns back. God, I thought you said you saw the freakin' movie."

Dean shook his head in disbelief, staring at Ash. "Yeah, let's pretend this isn't the movie for a minute, and move on."

"Only if Bobby stops singing _Follow the Yellow Brick Road_, under his breath." Ash let out a weak, almost pathetic sounding growl. "It's really starting to get on my nerves."

"Was not singin'."

"Oh, you were so singing," Sam interjected, a smile dimpling his cheeks. "Even saw you skip once or twice when you thought no one was looking."

"I tripped. You try walking around wearing a tin suit. Not easy." Bobby pushed his funnel cap down lower so it sat at a tilt on the side of his head, and strode away. Dean and Sam picked up their pace, following after Bobby.

At the sound of several more owls screeching ominously, Ash snatched hold of his tail, and worriedly kneaded it through his paws as he hurried to catch up with them. "I do believe in spooks . . . I do believe in spooks. I do – I do – I do – I do – I do."

Cocking a brow, Dean turned to look at Ash. "Hey, Cowardly . . . we all believe in spooks . . . it's kinda our thing, so can ya shut up?"

"Dorothy's right." Sam glanced at Dean and smiled. "You don't see her running around like a girl because of a few owls." He paused, and his grin deepened. "Course all bets are of when Dean sees the flying monkeys."

"Sammy." Dean shook his head, glaring at his brother in clear warning.

Ash looked from Sam to Dean and then back again, and raised a brow. "Why?"

"Dean was always freaked out by the monkeys, had to leave the room whenever they came on."

"So not true, dude . . . just wanted to make popcorn for the good parts."

"I don't ever recall having popcorn while watching the movie." Sam chuckled when he noticed Dean's eyes narrow considerably.

Dean stalked away, calling back over his shoulder, "They're just not natural . . . I mean really, what the hell do you have to cross with a monkey to get it to have wings?"

Sam, Ash, and Bobby looked at each other for a moment and then all shrugged.

"Dude's got a point," Sam said.

"Yeah, never thought about it like that before." Ash visibly cringed.

Bobby gestured toward the sky, and frowned. "Well, maybe one of you knuckleheads can ask them."

Hearing what Bobby said, Dean stopped dead in his tracks and looked upward. The sky above was filled with dark winged creatures heading in their direction. Turning, he quickly rushed back to his brother's side. Without giving it a second thought, Dean pulled out his .45 and started shooting toward the sky, scattering the monkeys.

"Dude, what the hell are you doing." Sam grabbed hold of his arm.

"What does it look like I'm doing, Sam?" Dean shrugged Sam's hand away, and continued shooting at the winged-creatures.

Sam inclined his head toward the sky, and shrugged. "Well, unless you got like a hundred bullets in that gun, I think you're just pissing them off."

Dean glanced down at his gun, realized the logic in his brother's words, and grinned. "Got any other ideas?"

"Yeah, think I do." Sam bobbed his head in the direction of the monkeys. "Me, Bobby, and Ash will hide out in the trees," he hitched a thumb back toward the dark woods, "while you let them take you to the Witch's castle, and when they're gone, we'll follow."

"And you made fun of my poppy plan."

"Dude, they're not gonna hurt ya . . . not like me. I get the stuffing kicked out of me literally." He gestured around the forest. "Really don't care to have some of me thrown over there, and there, and there."

Dean nodded in understanding, but then pointed toward the sky. "See your point, dude, but if I don't want to fly in an airplane, which has walls and a floor, why the hell would I want to take the winged-express to the Witch's Castle."

"The Wicked Witch is there . . . you know you always wanted to ask her why she gave Dorothy an hour to live instead of trying to kill her right away."

"True." Dean agreed, but then shook his head. "But, come on, Sammy, we're talkin' about winged-monkeys."

"Close your eyes, Dean. We're only talking like one mile here."

"What if they drop me?"

"Dude, they didn't drop Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz . . . they aren't gonna drop you."

"So says the Scarecrow who gonna be hiding out in the trees," Dean hitched a thumb toward the trees, "while I'm being carted off to the Witch's Castle by the creepy winged-things."

"Knew you'd see it my way." Sam said, heading for the cover of the trees. "Hey, Ash, and Bobby, Dorothy's got this one covered." He bobbed his head toward the forest of thick overgrown trees. "We're gonna sit this one out, and wait to rescue her."

"Sounds good to me," Ash said, and quickly ducked for cover amongst the large leafy fronds.

Dean watched as Bobby followed them as well. "You too, Bobby?"

Bobby turned to stare at him for a second. "Think Sam's got a point . . . and that whole ordeal where they pick me up in the air and then drop me . . . yeah, not gonna happen."

Dean raised both hands, and shrugged, shaking his head. "That wasn't the monkeys who did that . . . it was the spooks."

"Monkeys . . . spooks . . .all I know is I'm with Sam." Bobby turned and clomped away into the cover of trees.

Glancing into the sky, Dean noticed the monkeys starting to descend toward him. "Sammy, what am I supposed to do now?"

"I don't know, Dean," Sam called from the veil of trees. "Prance around looking girlie, and fluff your hair."

"Don't want to date them, dude."

Sam peeked his head out from between several large ferns, and glanced skyward. "Then run around screaming like a girl that should draw their attention to you."

"Don't know, dude, not sure I can pull it off." Quirking a brow, he stared at his brother, chuckling at how ridiculous Sam looked hidden amongst the large waxy fronds. "From where I'm standing, all the girls look like their hiding out in the trees."

Dean opened his mouth about to say something else, but two winged-monkeys swooped down, clutched a hold him by the arms, and dragged him upward into the air. Others landed, searched around for a few moments, sniffing at the air, then took to flight once more.

"So gonna kick your ass for this, Sammy," Dean called out, before he was too high in the air for Sam to hear him anymore.

After the monkeys had flown back into the sky, Sam, Ash, and Bobby came out of hiding. They all glanced skyward, and were silent for a moment.

"Huh," Ash began, waving his paws back and forth. "Kinda looks like a little miniature Dean doll with tiny kicking legs, doesn't it."

Sam cocked his head to the side, and stared at his brother's disappearing form. "Yeah, it really kinda does, now that you mention it."

Bobby nodded in agreement. "So, now what?"

Scrubbing his gloved hand across his face, Sam bobbed his head in the direction of the castle. "Well, we go to the castle, dress up like those . . . those . . . does anyone have any idea what those things are?"

"Haven't a clue," Ash quickly supplied. "Always thought they might be the monkeys' fathers."

"Huh," Sam nodded. "Can kinda see that. Them being all gray, and the whole face thing they had going on — " he opened his mouth to say more, but Bobby cut him off.

"You idiots gonna focus here." Bobby tried crossing his tin arms, found he couldn't, and scowled. "Cause we are talking about Dean here. An' knowin' him, he'll probably piss off the Wicked Witch off so much, she'll only give him a half-hour to live."

"True," both boys said, simultaneously.

"So we go dress up like the monkeys' daddies," Sam said, quickly outlining the plan. "Find Dean in the tower, break him out, and melt the witch. Simple enough."

"You forgot one thing," Bobby said as he turned to head toward the castle.

"What's that?" Sam asked, following him.

"You're Winchester's . . . . nothing ever comes that easy for you."

Ash hurried to catch up to them, and fell in line beside them. "He's got a point, dude. You guys are kinda like a beacon for trouble."

"It's just a freakin' movie, we already . . . ." Sam's voice trailed off as he thought of his brother alone with the Wicked Witch. "He's so gonna piss her off and then the whole plotline is gonna go all to hell. Better start working on a plan B."


	6. Chapter 6

_so, new chappy posted...yeah, Dean definitely pisses the Wicked Witch off in thsi chappy...hope you enjoy!! thanks for reading...tell me what you think...bambers;)_

_Chapter Six_

The two winged monkeys carrying Dean, flew through the large open archway of the tower, and set him down lightly on the ground. Opening his eyes, Dean breathed a sigh of relief as he glanced around the darkened castle. _Sam is so dead when I get my hands on him. _

He marveled at the sight of the huge stone throne with a crimson cushion, and then at the oversized crystal ball. Stalking over to the gazing sphere, Dean rubbed his hand across its smooth surface. _Huh, wonder if it picks up the porn channel? _After a few moments of seeing nothing but swirling black smoke, he frowned. _Guess they didn't do porn back then._

Dean turned, his steady gaze searching for the witch, and spied the large hourglass with blood red sand trapped within the glass. _Why an hour? Why not fifteen minutes . . . or ten for that matter? _

The Wicked Witch stepped out of the darkness and crept toward Dean, her long black dress swishing softly against the stone floor. She pointed her long bent fingers toward him. "I want those slippers the Glinda gave to you."

"Yeah, so not gonna happen." Dean said as he stared awestruck at her. He strode past her, and picked up the heavy hourglass, and turned it over. "I'm not Dorothy, an hour is way too long. Most witches I've dealt with just try an' kill me, they don't give me time to ponder my fate."

Turning, the Wicked Witch glared at him as she stroked her long pointed green chin."These things must be done delicately . . . or you hurt the spell." She stalked to him, and snatched the hourglass out of his hand, and turned it back over.

Dean picked up the round wooden mortar and heavy pestle off the table and started grinding the red powder inside the container. "Gotta tell ya, I'm you're biggest fan. Never missed the Wizard of Oz when I was younger . . . well, there was that one year. . . . "

She tried to grab them away from him, but Dean twisted and strode to the throne and sat, all the while still mixing the red powder. He glanced up at her, and grinned. "True story, never even told Sammy this, but ah, what the hell. The first witch hunt I went on with my Dad was a huge let down cause she wasn't green." Moving the pestle up and down, he gestured toward her with it. "And well, she wasn't wearing that black dress either. . . . Killed her, but it just wasn't the same."

"You're a most annoying young man."

"Naw, I'm adorable." Dean glanced at the flying monkeys hovering in the archway, and shuddered. "Why flying monkeys? And come on, those little monkey suits you got them dressed up in . . . you do dress them right? I mean, they can't really dress themselves." Dean thought about it for a moment, and shuddered again. "Yeah, so don't want the answer to that one."

The Wicked Witch stalked over to him and snatched the mortar and pestle out of his hands. "Think an hour may just be too long." She stroked her long chin again. Arching her thin black brows, she continued to glare at him. "But how."

"Oh, you gotta say with poison. You know like with the poppies. Missed hearing that line, an' it was one of my favorites."

"Oh, very well, something with poison in it, I think," she cackled. "With poison in it, but attractive to the eye, and soothing to the smell."

"Not a big fan of poppies, could you make it a brunette . . . with great legs . . . and a nice tan . . . the attractive to the eye and soothing to the smell part is fine though." Dean stretched in his seat, then leaned back, settling into the soft cushion. A devilish grin crossed his features. "Although I would take a redhead or a blonde as well."

The Wicked Witch returned to the table and set the mortar and pestle down, and pick up the hour glass. Turning it over, she pointed a spindly finger at it, and the sand started to quickly slide through the narrow opening until half of it was gone. "Do you see this? That's how much longer you have to be alive. And it isn't long my pretty. It isn't long."

Dean stood, walked to her, snatched the hourglass from her and shook it vigorously, more sand sliding through the thin opening. "Now that isn't long. Sammy and I once killed a witch in under ten minutes, and we're out drinkin' beers at a bar in the amount of time you gave me."

He set the hourglass down, then turned and leaned against the study wooden table. "An' seriously, we all know how this ends. We play ring around the rosy pocket full of spears, you try and burn Sammy . . . I get pissed and dump a well placed bucket of water over you head. You melt. We all break out in song. An' that's pretty much it except for the clicking of the heels." Dean watched her reaction to his words, grinning when he saw her frown. "Think maybe even the monkeys were singing, but definitely know those guard thingies were."

"A bucket of water, you say?"

"Yeah, always wondered if it was tap water or holy water. Figure it has to be tap water, right? Cause what kinda witch would keep a bucket of holy water lying around."

"Not a very clever witch."

Dean nodded in agreement. "My thoughts exactly."

The Wicked Witch turned and stalked toward the heavy wooden double doors. "You have fifteen minutes, and that is definitely not a long time." When she reached the entrance, she turned and glared at him. "But just so you don't get lonely while I'm gone, have a little something special planned for you."

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

"So how much time do you think he has?" Ash asked, pawing at his tail.

"Knowing Dean," Sam hesitated for a minute, scratching his stomach, bits of hay falling to the ground. "I'm thinkin' no more the fifteen minutes tops."

"I was thinkin' more like ten," Bobby said as he oiled his stiff joints.

"Could be ten. Depends on how long she sticks around to hear his favorite childhood memories of the movie." Sam chuckled, thinking of something his father had told him. "True story, don't tell my brother this, but the first witch hunt Dean went on, he asked my Dad why the witch wasn't green. And as my Dad is tryin to kill the bitch, Dean runs to the kitchen sink, fills a bucket of water and dumps it on her head."

"John must've been pissed," Bobby said, trying to hide his amusement over the thought of a younger Dean dumping tap water over a witch's head.

"Yeah, especially since she used her magic to whip that bucket at my Dad's head, and he had to get twelve stitches." Sam laughed as he recalled Dean's face as his father hollered at him, and Dean's response to his father's tirade. "When my father asked why he did it, all Dean could think to say was that it always worked in the movies. Of course after that, my father didn't allow Dean to watch Oz the next time it came on tv."

"So ten minutes then," Ash said, a grin on his face.

"Yeah, pretty much." Sam strode away from them heading toward the large cliffy hill the Witch's Castle sat perched upon.

Ash hurried to catch up, pointing back over his shoulder toward his tail. "Just so everyone knows, my tail is not a tow cable to get your sorry butts up the hill."

"Not thinkin that's gonna be a problem, Ash." Sam glanced at Ash's scrawny tail, and then at his thin frame, and shook his head. "We want to make it up the hill in one piece."

"Hey, I got a great tail . . . girls love my tail."

"Whatever dude. If that thought helps you get through the nights who am I to argue." Sam halted in his steps, and glanced up the steep hill directly in front of them. "Think we should've taken the monkey express."

"No freakin' way," Bobby grumbled. "Did you see how they almost dropped Dean? Course his little legs were flailing so much it was no wonder, but still."

"Yeah, kinda looked like a little karate action figure, and still swear I heard him screaming like a girl." Ash climbed onto a rocky outcropping, and lowered his paw to help Bobby up onto it.

"Dude, he was like a hundred feet up in the air. There was no way you could've heard him." Sam leapt onto a small boulder then grabbed onto a jutting rock, and pulled himself onto a small ledge.

"Don't care. That's the story I'm stickin' with." They skirted around several rocky cliffs and finally found a steep trail leading directly to the castle. "Wonder why they didn't just come this way in the movie?" Ash said as he peered over the side of steep incline.

"It was your big scene, Cowardly, and you just blew it." Sam gestured below toward the group of guards chanting as they marched back and forth at the portcullis. "Okay, so we wait here, the whatever they are creatures jump us, we kick some ass, and then we dress like them. Everyone understand the plan?"

"One question," Ash piped up. "Is it yo ee oh ye oh um?"

Bobby cuffed him across the mane. "What the hell are you talkin' about?"

"The guard's chant. For Christ's sake, am I the only one who ever watched the freakin movie."

"I ain't doin' no damn chant, Ash."

"Why, cause it doesn't start off with the verse, _we're off to see the wizard_? Cause you been singin that one right along."

"No, I haven't." Bobby scowled.

They crouched behind the rocks, waiting and watching the guards below, and anticipating the sneak attack from the rocky ledge above them. A small stone tumbled down and hit Sam on the shoulder, alerting him to the three creatures, and he swung into action. Grabbing hold of the creature's thick gray cloak, Sam heaved the guard over his shoulder. Hauling the creature to its feet, Sam slammed his fist into its nose, and grayish blood spurted from it. Two more quick jabs to the stomach, and the guard collapsed to the ground.

Sam turned to see that Bobby and Ash had already taken care of the other two guards. "What the hell kind of fight was that? He never even hit me."

"Dude, in the movie, a Tinman, Cowardly Lion, and a Scarecrow kicked their sorry asses." Ash shook his head. "What the hell were you expecting? The Terminator?"

Quickly donning the uniforms, they hurried to fall in line behind the guards as they headed inside the castle.

"Stop chanting, Ash," Bobby muttered. "You're not even doin' it right."

"Dude, we have to blend in."

"Yeah, try stop swishing your tail if want to fit in Oz boy," Sam said, as he motioned for them to break away from the crowd.

Quietly, they crept up the stairs, and headed down the long corridor toward the prison they knew Dean would be kept in. Reaching the double doors, Sam turned to Bobby, and held out his hand. "Give me your ax." He leaned against the doors, and called out to his brother. "Dean back away from the doors, I'm gonna bust them down."

"Why don't I just blow them open, Sam," Dean called back from the other side. "Would take a lot less time.

"Why don't we just stick to the plot on this one, Dorothy."

Dean was quiet for a moment, and Sam wondered whether he'd actually conceded to let Sam break down the door. "Don't think we can, Sammy."

"What do you mean, you don't think we can?" Sam chuckled, knowing that he more than likely was given only ten minutes to live.

"Sorta pissed her off."

"So how much time do we have."

"Fifteen minutes," Dean said then made a weird sound, startling Sam.

"Dude, you okay?" Sam asked in concern.

"Yeah, just back away so I can blow this damn door down," Dean replied and made the strange nosie again.

Sam, Ash, and Bobby backed away, and Dean fired his gun at the locks repeatedly until the doors slid open. Sam strode to the entrance and peered inside almost fearful at what he might find. His look of fear quickly turned to a smirk, and he started laughing.

Ash and Bobby rushed into the tower to see what had caused Sam's reaction, and both stopped short, peels of laughter ripping from their lips.

Dean grimaced at all of them, flapping his wings. "So not funny, Sammy."

"Oh, it's so freakin funny, monkeyboy," Sam said, nearly crying he was chuckling so hard. "Just had to piss her off, didn't you. Couldn't just follow the script."

"Nice little outfit you got there, dude." Ash gestured toward the blue and red suit coat Dean was wearing. "You kinda remind me of one of those little organ grinder monkeys." He motioned as if he was winding up the little play organ. "Damn, I wish I had a quarter to tip you."

"Damn, Dean, I gotta go with Sam and Ash on this one." Bobby chuckled, tears spilling down his tin cheeks. "You as a winged monkey just seems sorta . . . oh, I don't know . . . it's somehow seems so wrong, but yet it's so freakin hilarious, I don't know what to say."

"Yeah, thanks for that, Bobby." Dean headed for the door, calling back over his wing. "An' about that bucket of water, not gonna be there, so I would suggest we get moving."


	7. Chapter 7

_another chappy up...two in one day...not bad...thanks for reading!! bambers;)_

_Chapter Seven_

Dean gestured to the uniforms Sam, Bobby, and Ash were wearing and grinned. "You guys plannin' on taking off the Winkies uniforms at some point, or what, cause we need to get outta here."

"The what?" Sam asked, staring at his brother, a puzzled expression on his face.

"Winkies uniforms. You know the Witch's guards."

Sam shook his head in disbelief, his brows raising as he continued to stare at his brother in amazement. "What the hell, dude, you have the script hidden somewhere back in the Impala? No one knows that."

"Um, I knew that," Ash said, raising his paw slightly to draw attention to himself.

"You so didn't know that, dude." Sam and Dean said, simultaneously.

"Oh, I so did know it, just didn't want to be the only one who did." Both brothers stared at him in disbelief, so he gestured to himself, and continued, "Okay, huge Oz freak here. Read the book like a thousand times, seen the movie I don't know how many times, and also know some things even Dean doesn't know."

"Yeah, like what," Dean challenged, not liking someone else knowing more about Oz than him.

"The head winged monkey was named Nikko. There were actually seven pairs of ruby slippers made for the movie, not just one. And there were two film techniques used to make the movie, sepia tone and technicolor." Ash crossed his arms, smiling proudly. "I could go on, but I think we both know who the bigger fan is now."

"Got me there, Ash." Dean pressed his lips firmly together, trying hard not to laugh. "You keep that information stored away with your Oz porcelain doll collection? Or do you display it next to your genuine replicas of the ruby red slippers?"

Ash averted his gaze which left little doubt in anyone's mind that he did have some sort of Oz memorabilia hidden somewhere in his room back at the Roadhouse.

Quickly removing their borrowed uniforms, the foursome headed out of the tower room, and down the long corridor. Dean walked on ahead of Sam, Bobby, and Ash, listening to them snicker and taunt him and his stupid flying monkey appearance.

"He is not."

Dean heard his brother defend him, and smiled.

"Oh, he so is," Ash countered.

"That's not even a freakin' word."

"Is too."

"Use it in a sentence then."

"'Kay . . . your brother, Dean, is walking monkeyshyly." Ash grinned as Dean turned to glare at him. "See, told you it was a word."

"Yeah," Dean smirked, "just like lionasskicky is word."

Sam chuckled, eying his brother. "Careful, Dean, think he could almost take ya now." He tilted his head from side to side, looking his brother over. "You kinda look . . . oh, I dunno, shorter somehow, kinda bow-legged. And, dude, I gotta tell ya, that whole monkey hopping thing you're doing is kinda freaking me out a little." Sam threw his head back and laughed, the sound of it echoing through the old stone castle.

"Keep laughin', Scarecrowboy, cause you're the bait."

The laughter died on Sam's lips hearing that. "Why the hell do I always have to be the bait." He yanked on the sleeve of his green tunic, straw slipping out of it and falling to the ground. "Remember, she sets the Scarecrow on fire. So don't want to be set on fire, Dean."

"Quit being a girl, Sammy. She isn't gonna set you on fire. I gotta a plan."

"What plan, Dean?" Sam stared at him long and hard for a few moments, then sarcastically added, "Planning on spitting on her cause as you said, the bucket of water won't be there. Someone just couldn't help themselves and probably asked her to repeat lines from the movie."

"Holy water, Sam," he said, ignoring his brother's comment as he yanked his silver flask out of his pocket. "You distract her, and I'll douse the bitch with it."

"Think your monkey arms are long enough to reach her head, dude?" Ash smirked, making swinging arm gestures like a monkey. "If not, I can do it," he added, flexing his muscles. "After all, I am king of the forest."

"Umm . . . dude, _Cowardly_ Lion," Dean said, stressing the word cowardly, "as in chicken of the forest."

"You two, chuckleheads, plan on moving along anytime soon," Bobby admonished sternly, "cause I got cars that need repairing back at the salvage yard, and would like to get to them before I rust again."

Once again they started down the corridor with Dean in the lead, Sam and Ash bringing up the rear, while Bobby clanked along in the middle.

"He's so gonna give us away, dude," Ash whispered to Sam. "It's like walking behind a huge clanking tin garbage can."

"I can hear you, Ash," Bobby grumbled.

"Sorry, Bobby, meant that in the nicest possible way." Ash grabbed hold of his lion's tail, running it through his paws. He glanced down at it, then looked at Dean's monkey tail, and back to his again, and smirked. "Hey, monkeyboy, my tail is longer than yours."

Dean stopped abruptly, Bobby bumping into him, and swung to glare at Ash. "Dude, your tail isn't longer than mine."

"It so is." Ash cracked a grin and then burst out laughing. "Oh, how the mighty have crumbled."

Dean shook his head in disgust, a high pitched hoo-hooing sound escaping his lips before he could prevent it, and even Bobby couldn't help laughing, although to his credit, he had the decency to turn away.

"Even if it is, it isn't the size that counts, dude, it's what you can do with it."

"He's got you there, Ash." Sam smirked as he hurried to catch up with Dean who strode on ahead of them.

"So where we going, Dean?" Sam asked, once he'd finally caught up to his brother.

"Figure we'd go to where we play 'ring around the rosy, pocket full of spears', and wait for her there."

Sam shrugged, and scratched his head, nearly knocking off his felt hat. "Sounds like as good of plan as any. Think the holy water will melt her?"

"Don't see why not," Dean said, then hearing the sound of the Winkie guards chanting, he jutted out his arm to stop Sam from moving forward, and motioned toward the stone stairs leading to the turrets above. "Up that way."

Ash and Bobby followed as Sam and Dean scurried up the stairs, and ran through one of the towers circular rooms. Sam grimaced noticing the glowing flames of several torches, knowing in the story the Wicked Witch set her broom ablaze using one of them. They rushed out of the room and out onto the walkway that was surrounded by tall stone ramparts.

From atop of one of the turrets, the Wicked Witch stood, glaring down at them from between the embrasures, a wicked gleaming smile alighting her face. "Going so soon? I wouldn't hear of it. Why my little party's just beginning."

Dean stared at her in awe. Punching Sam in the arm, he inclined his head toward the witch. "Gotta love her, Sam."

"Yeah, Dean, feelin' the love, now can we get moving before she sets me on fire."

From both sides of them, the Winkies moved in, brandishing sharpened halberds and herding the boys and Bobby and Ash into a close knit circle.

"Trapped," Ash uttered, "trapped like mice – er – rats!" He chuckled, giving himself a high five for being able to fit in another line from the movie. "God, I'm good."

"Can we quit with the movie lines," Sam snapped, his steady gaze never leaving the witch who was grasping on tightly to her broom.

"Damn, Sam, it not like we're in danger," Ash hastily replied, then glanced at the fiery torch beside the witch, and grimaced. "Well, not all of us anyway."

Sam nudged Dean in the arm to garner his attention, and then motioned toward the witch. "Okay, now what?"

Almost reluctantly, Dean drew his gaze from the Wicked Witch to look at his brother. "Huh?"

"The plan? Remember, I distract her and you go in for the kill." Dean hesitated a few more minutes, and Sam knew instinctively why. "Dude, she's not gonna say it, we're already up here . . . already trapped."

"You don't know that. She could still say it."

"How about this, Dean, we dart past the axe-wielding guards," Sam said in exasperation, making little scissor-like motions with his gloved fingers, "run around in circles, only to end up back here, so she can say, ring around the rosy, a pocket full of spears, would that make you happy?"

"Hmm . . ." Dean shrugged, his lips drawing up into a pout as he nodded, "yeah, it really kinda would."

Heaving a sigh, Sam shook his head. "So not gonna happen, dude."

The Wicked Witch glided down the circular staircase, and stalked to them. Pointing her long spindly finger toward Dean, she cackled. "Thought you were pretty foxy, didn't you? Well, the last to go will see the first three go before him."

Cocking a brow, she turned her attention to Sam who had moved slightly ahead of Dean. Sam gestured for Ash and Bobby to do the same, and soon they all stood in front of Dean, hiding him from view so he could open the flask of holy water. The Wicked Witch raised her broom to the torch, and the flames quickly devoured the long bristles.

"How about a fire Scarecrow? Huh?" saying that, she quickly set Sam's arm ablaze, and Ash and Bobby hurried to put out the flames as Dean rushed forward and threw the holy water in her face.

She sputtered, spitting the water out of her mouth. "Oohhh . . . Curse you brat! Look what you've done." White smoke rose from the witch's body as she slowly shrunk in stature. "I'm melting! Melting!" Curling snakelike she continued to evaporate, her black dress engulfing her. "Oh, what a world! What a world! Who would've thought a good little boy like you could destroy my beautiful wickedness? Oooohhhh . . . Look out! Look out! I'm going. Ooooohhhh . . . ." She disappeared into nothingness leaving behind only her inky black dress, pointed hat and broomstick.

Dean quickly turned to his brother to make sure he was all right, and saw that Ash and Bobby had managed to put out the flames before they could hurt his brother, and let out a deep sigh of relief. "You okay, Sammy?"

Sam nodded, holding onto his arm. "Yeah, but next time I get to douse the witch and you get to be the bait. Just knew she was gonna set me on fire."

The leader of the Winkies stepped forward, lowering his halberd as he looked from Dean to Sam and back again. "She's — she's dead. You've killed her."

"Yeah, liquidated the bitch." Dean chuckled, mentally patting himself on the back for adding in another phrase from movie.

The Winkie turned to his fellow guardsmen, and raised his weapon. "Hail to the um . . . ." He tilted his head to the side, and looked Dean up and down. "Ummm . . . hail to the odd little monkey-like creature. The Wicked Witch is dead."

All the Winkies cheered as they chanted, 'ding-dong the Wicked Witch is dead'. The cheers grew as the winged-monkeys joined in on the festivities, and only died down when Dean bent and picked the broom up off the ground.

"We need this so we can get back home."

"It's yours," the lead Winkie said cheerfully. "Take it."

Dean bobbed his head in the direction of the exit, and Sam, Ash, and Bobby followed. As they were heading back down the steps toward the entrance of the castle, Ash started chuckling, and everyone stopped to stare at him.

"What's so funny," Bobby asked gruffly.

"Well, it's almost the end of the story," Ash supplied between guffaws.

"And?" Dean cocked a brow, and glared at him, not liking where Ash's train of thought was heading.

"End of the story . . . don't you get it." He cuffed Sam on the arm and motioned toward Dean's feet, and Sam broke out into laughter as well.

"Oh, dude, you so have to put on the ruby red slippers." Sam's laughter increased, tears running down his cheeks. "Ah, there is a God, and he's smiling on me today."

"I'm so not putting on any girl's shoes," Dean grumbled as he heard Bobby snicker.

"Aww . . . come on, Dean," Bobby grinned wickedly, "I've been dyin' to hear you say, there's no place like home, while clicking yer pretty little red shoes together. Would kinda make up for the whole me being stuck in a metal suit with no way to go to the bathroom on my own thing."

"Yeah, and my straw in places that I can't scratch without it looking obscene thing."

"Or, my lion suit that is too damn big and is pooling around my feet thing."

"What about me?" Dean said incredulously. "I was turned into a freakin' flyin' monkey."

The three looked at each other, and without uttering a word they all nodded in some sort of silent understanding.

"We're figurin' that was your own fault," Bobby said diplomatically. "Shouldn't have goaded on the witch."

"Sam?" Dean looked to his brother for help, but was met with more peels of laughter.

"Dude, you are so puttin' on those shoes cause I'm ready to go home."

"Fine." Dean stormed away, leaving them behind, but called back over his shoulder, "but payback's a bitch."


	8. Chapter 8

_okay, so last chappy!! i just loved writing this story, and really hoped everyone enjoyed it as well!! thanks for reading and all the awesome reviews!! bambers;)_

_Chapter Eight_

As the boys, Bobby, and Ash stood in front of the giant green head that was John, Dean shifted uncomfortably, scratching at his long hairy monkey arms.

"Got fleas?" Ash whispered to him, and choked on his laughter as Dean scowled at him.

Dean turned to look at the massive floating head encompassed within writhing orange technicolor flames and swirling black smoke, and his frown deepened, knowing he'd have to put on the ruby red slippers in front of his father if they were ever going to get home. "Brought you back her damn broomstick, ready to go home now."

"See you pissed her off," John's loud voice boomed, echoing throughout the room, and Sam, Ash and Bobby chuckled. "How did you manage to kill her?"

"Holy water," Dean supplied, not paying attention to the sounds of laughter still issuing forth from his companions.

"You liquidated her, eh . . . very resourceful."

"Yeah, yeah, did what you taught me to do, now can we get on with this?" Dean stalked to the corner of the room and pulled back the billowing green velvet curtain hiding John from view, slightly starling the older man. "An' just to let you know, I ain't flyin' home in any damn hot-air balloon."

"Huh, guess that means you'll have to put on those ruby red slippers," John uttered, a smirk on his face. His expression suddenly turned serious. "But you never really needed my help getting home, you've always had the power to go back home, so tell me what you've learned?"

Dean thought about what his father asked for a moment, and all he'd experienced, then looked at Sam, Ash, and Bobby. Turning back to John, he said, "I learned that Sam has straw in places he'd rather not have them in, Bobby secretly loves to sing show tunes and when no one's looking he'll even dance to them, and Ash . . . discovered that he collects Oz memorabilia, and also learned that I'm probably gonna kick his ass when we get back home." Seeing Ash blanch slightly, Dean grinned. "Oh, yeah, and that whole, 'there's no place like home' thing."

Frowning, Dean scrubbed his large monkey-paw across his face. "Still don't know why there would be holy water sitting in a bucket at the witch's castle though. Think that's just bad scripting if you ask me. But the Wicked Witch didn't disappoint."

"Hey, Siskel," Sam called out to Dean, shaking his head, straw falling from beneath his hat, "if you're just about done with your movie commentary, give it two enthusiastic paws up, and then we all can be getting home."

To the sounds of riotous laughter coming from everyone in the room, Dean yanked out the ruby red slippers, took off his shoes and put them on. Sam quickly pulled out his cell phone, and snapped off three pictures before Dean could stop him.

"Sorry, dude, but this just truly is a Kodak moment," Sam said, hastily returning the phone to his pocket before Dean could snatch it out of his hands. "After all, how often am I gonna get the opportunity to get a picture of you as a monkey putting on girl's shoes."

"Hey, Sam could you make me a few copies?" Ash asked. "Bribery, just in case Dean tries to make good on that whole ass kicking comment."

"Yeah, I'll take one too," Bobby piped in, still laughing, "cause well, it's just too damn funny not to have one."

"Sam, you're so dead if anyone ever sees those pictures."

"You all just about ready to go home?" John asked in a no-nonsense manner.

"Yeah," they all said in unison.

"Okay, grab hands and Dean click your heels together, and say, there's no place like home three times." John stood back as they all clasped hands.

"There's no place like home," Dean said, feeling a strange swirling sensation in the pit of his stomach. "There's no place like home." A rush of wind settled over the four of them causing them all to close their eyes, and Dean felt himself slipping into darkness. "There's no place like home."

"Dean, wake up," Sam said in a breathless rush. "Come on, dude, open your eyes for me."

Blinking hard, Dean slowly adjusted his eyes to the sunlight streaming through the car window. "Where am I?" he asked as he looked around in confusion and saw his brother sitting beside him.

"Carried you back here after we finished off the witch," Sam quickly supplied. "You hit your head pretty hard and have been unconscious for like the past fifteen minutes. I was really gettin' worried."

"Did we liquidate her?" Dean asked in confusion.

"No, filled her full of iron rounds." Sam looked at him, a puzzled expression on his face. "You sure you're okay? Maybe I should take you to a hospital."

"No, don't need to go to the hospital." Dean glanced around, searching for Bobby and Ash. "Where's Bobby and Ash?"

"Bobby and Ash?" Sam quirked a brow. "Probably at home, why?"

"They were here, right?"

"No . . . you sure you don't want to go to the hospital?"

"Don't need to go to the hospital, Sammy."

Dean straightened up in the backseat of the Impala, and winced, his head pounding mercilessly. "And Dad?"

"Don't know where he is. You know that." Sam was quiet for a moment as he tended to the gash on Dean's forehead, and then asked, "You sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, just had the strangest dream, and you were there, and so was Dad, Bobby, and Ash."

Sam nodded in understanding. "Wouldn't have by any chance been wandering down the yellow brick road in that dream, would you have, Dean?"

"Yeah, how did you know?"

"I knew it," Sam shook his head in irritation, "I so told you not to watch Oz last night before the hunt."

"It was real, Sammy. And Dad was the wizard, and the Wicked Witch of the West was so freakin' cool." Dean thought about everything that had happened, and smiled. "Holy water, dude. There was holy water in the bucket."

"Good to know," Sam rolled his eyes, "one of the world's greatest mysteries solved, now can we get the hell out of here?"

"Yeah." Dean slowly got out of the backseat, opened the front door and slid into the seat, shutting the door behind him.

Sam put the medical supplies back in the first aid kit and then followed. As he sat in his seat beside Dean, Sam turned to look at him, and Dean grinned.

"I swear, Dean, if you say there's no place like home, I'm takin' you to the hospital to get your head looked at."

"Nope, wasn't gonna say that."

"Well, you looked like you were gonna say something."

"Was just thinkin' about payin' Ash a visit."

"Why?" Sam said as he yanked out his cell to give Ash a call to say they were coming. He glanced at it for a second, brows pulling together in confusion. "Dean, what the hell is this?"

Dean snatched the phone out of his hand, looked at the picture of a monkey in ruby red slippers, and quickly deleted it along with the other two pictures of him as a flying monkey. "That's why we're going to pay a visit to Ash . . . cause payback's a bitch, and Sammy," Dean grinned as he loving ran his fingers across the steering wheel, "there really is no place like home."


End file.
